Birthday Blues

Dear Advice Sisters:

I had my birthday a few weeks ago and I invited all of my friends for a party. One of my best friends not only didn't show, she didn't even respond to my invitation! Now, she's having a birthday party and has invited me. She's never even mentioned not coming to my party. No "Happy birthday, sorry I couldn't make it to your party." -- Nothing! I'm still kind of mad at her and I don't really want to go to her party, but I feel like I should. What do you think?

Sincerely,
Birthday Blues

Dear BB,

Hey, a party is a party! Will your other friends be there? I'm betting they will. So, why not just go and have fun? And, if you want to patch things up with your friend, find a quiet moment (NOT in front of all of your other friends, unless you really never want to speak to her again) to say, "Hey, I really missed you at my birthday party. I wish you could have been there." Maybe she'll have a good reason, maybe she won't. Maybe you'll find out that she never even got the invite and was hurt that she wasn't invited! Either way, you'll get an idea of what's going on and you can both start working on getting over it. And, if she doesn't have a good reason, you can always keep her present and give her a box of dog poo instead!

Madame Never Wrong

Dear Birthday Blues,

Happy belated birthday wishes to you!! I hope you were still able to have some fun on your birthday, it only comes around once a year, and no one should get you down on your day. I'm sure you must have been/are mad at your best friend right now for not coming to your party, not r.s.v.p.'ing, and then not apologizing (I would be too). But what I wouldn't do is over-react. I am very sure there is an explanation for it all. For all you know, she might not have gotten your invitation and is probably wondering why you are mad at her. The best way to deal with this is to actually deal with it. Don't assume your best friend knows how you feel. I know we all want our bffs too read minds and know us better than anyone. Still, she is human and not wonder woman. Invite her over to your house before the day of the party, and talk to her. Find out why she didn't come, r.s.v.p, and apologize. Tell her how you felt let down, hurt, and mad. If she really is your friend I am sure she will be really sorry, and give a reasonable explanation, and ask you to please attend her party even though she couldn't make yours. If she doesn't feel that way, then by all means go with Madame Never Wrong's Idea. Don't give up the chance to go out and have fun with your friends because of a little rift. Now go on and have fun, and don't do anything your mother wouldn't do!

Miss Always Right